Alone (Poem)

Again, I know I write downer poems, but it's how I get my feelings out. Hope you can take something from this.  God Bless! 

Alone

I hate the way that I look,

Can't stand the way I am,

Struggling to keep it all sealed up, 

Inside my head like a can.

My life has lost all meaning,

In fact it makes no sense,

Nothing to show for my life for years,

But a body and mind of dents.

Why can't I escape this madness, 

How long is it going to take,

For me to get back self respect,

Or end it for sanity's sake?

Perhaps I'll go crazy,

I may never break free,

Perhaps I AM just useless,

This isn't the life for me.

Some say that I'm not trying,

Or that I'm just a waste,

The sad part is I agree,

But the words have bitter taste.

I feel alone and scared,

And worth nobody's time,

If I can't justify it myself,

How could others value my life?

I don't know how to escape it,

Feeling totally off the rails,

Never can I speak the words,

My mind is terribly frail.

People try to help me,

They try so hard to care,

I won't talk to those around me,

It would only make them scared.

I hate to be this person,

I'm nothing but dead weight,

Ones I love are left to carry, 

Will I ever escape this fate?

I try hard to remember, 

Others have more pain,  

I'm afraid to voice my thoughts, 

Cause the truth would be too plain.

All it would do is scare them,

The ones I love so dear,

I already cause too much pain,

And even too much fear.

My desire to explain,

Is the intention of this poem,

I hate feeling so empty, 

Living my life in my head. ALONE!